Monday, August 16, 2010

Stillness of the Mind

It began with a song, a classical piece that I heard streaming through the classical radio station at work a few weeks ago. It was new to me. I clicked to see who the composer was, what the song was, and wrote them both down: Korzeniowski, A single man. Stillness of the mind. At home, I entered the composer and song into Google to see if there was a YouTube and there it was. It turns out this piece is from the soundtrack for a movie called, A Single Man. I minimized the short clip, and each time it would stop, I would replay and replay over and over, to stay in the haunting beauty that Korzeniowski created—this composer whom I had never heard of, a movie unknown to me. I wrote while I listened and I felt that his music infused my writing, entered into my veins and touched what I wrote.

I wasn’t interested in the movie for some reason. It was the song I was after. A few days went by, and I kept coming back to this piece of music at different moments. I finally clicked to expand and read what the movie was about. It sounded promising. A movie that deals with the loss of the male protagonist’s male significant other. It turned out to be the most elegant portrayal of grief and life. It also felt as if the first time where I listened to the director speak about the movie after I finished watching it, and what he described is exactly what I felt. He, Tom Ford, fashion designer, accomplished his task, in this—his directorial debut. This isn’t always the case. Often it seems a director tries to take on too much, and the nuances are lost—the message isn’t fully conveyed. I don’t want to say much more. If you are curious and listen to the clip below, you can read a small synopsis of the movie. If you have not seen the movie, I think you will be moved in some way.

When I added the movie to my queue, and it arrived, I held onto it for days, a week, before I found just the right time to watch it because I knew it would be sad. It would bring me to a place that I had to be prepared for. Do other’s do that, I wonder? Hold onto things until they are ready to submit to a sadness that they know will be found on the screen? Or do others altogether avoid it and stick with other types of movies?

I have not read the book. Perhaps one day I will.

Here is the beautiful song below that captivated me and brought this movie to my awareness.


keiko amano said...


It's a beautiful music. You're right. It takes a preparation to watch that kind of movie. The other day, I wanted to lift my mood, so I borrowed a DVD, "Wedding Crashers" and watched it. Yesterday, my gardener came and fixed my sprinkler. How relieved I am. But I probably cannot prepare myself for a sad story right now. You are brave.

Luciana said...

Beautiful composition, Rebbs. But somehow it doesn´t bring me stillness of the mind, it brings me sadness. There´s something about violins and adagio that reminds me of sorrow.
I, too, wait until I feel confident to read or watch something I know will touch me deeply. I know what you mean. I agree with Keiko: you´re brave! :-)

Rebb said...

Keiko, "Wedding Crashers," was funny. I hope it did lift your mood. "Meet the Parents" made me laugh a lot when it first came out. Glad to hear your sprinkler is fixed. I'm surprised I felt prepared, but I'm glad I was that day.

Rebb said...

I'm really glad you found the composition beautiful too, Lu. Yes, it is haunting and sad and I can see how it does not immediately bring stillness. But I suppose in that deep sadness, a stillness does eventually surface.

One movie that took me a very long time to watch was "Ghandhi." It may have even taken me years before I finally submitted.

Hopefully, I can be brave for more sad movies. I think I’m ready for a comedy, though! :)